> unnecessary abstraction, leading me to wonder whether programmers actually know the languages they're using or are barely scraping by with the very minimal basics

It is more that they have good abstract thinking, so abstraction is not an issue for them. Abstractions are issue only for some people.

> I think that second line probably took longer to write than it did for me to read.

If it takes more time to read then write, then it is not done yet needs to be refactored. Good code is as obvious to read as possible.